Saturday, 12 December 2015

What is your advice about flirt kind of relations?


A Brief Description of the Question: 
What is your advice about flirt kind of relations?
The Answer: 
Neither the word flirt takes place in the dictionary of the Muslims, nor the meaning it carries finds life in the life of the Muslims; whoever loads whatever meaning into it. Islam puts definite borders on this sensitive issue and Hz. Muhammad’s (pbuh) famous warning takes both parts under protection with definite rules.
What is our prophet’s definite and very logical warning?
– If two strangers, a woman and a man remain in private, the third one is the Satan!
Yes, when two strangers of opposite sex remain in private when there is no other one around, their sexual senses become active by their creation and they may rebel. Then things become dangerous. We know that most of the regrets, evils, even murders in the society occur because of not paying attention to this warning and going beyond the borders.   
Isn’t there an exception of this; is every woman and man like this?
Of course we have not such a claim and every rule may have its exceptions. But exceptions do not change the general rule. Truth that the woman should not be too familiar and saucy, she should not become a toy for fun easy to acquire and leave.
As we know easy come easy go. We can not appreciate the things we have easily and we can leave them easily. And precious things are acquired hard, thus they are not left easily too. The woman is the most precious of the values, and the first to protect the honor. If she becomes one day here and one day there she becomes sentenced to disgrace for her life. And whether you call flirt or something else the thing which makes the precious woman such worthless and discredited, neither it can be defended nor it can be considered as a simple and natural issue.
Again as we learn from a holy text, parts will regret the illegitimate relations such that they will cry in the afterlife:
– If only I held a piece of fire and didn’t start such a relation giving these consequences.
But it will have no use. Because the bullet shots the target and destroys it with no return back.
Therefore a faithful woman does not want to have a past with faults, and acts very carefully for a happy marriage and family life. And because of this care and attention she carries the pride of having the honor and lives happily without regret.  
Men making women joy for their daily life instead of a founder for a clean and happy family, or women accepting this, may not agree with us. But as you make your bed, you lie on it.

Ahmed Şahin, Aile İlmihali (catechism for family), 142.


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