When in Islam ALLAH says: you cannot force your daughter to marry someone they do not like
A Brief Description of the Question:
When in Islam ALLAH says: you cannot force your daughter to marry someone they do not like. So what about child marriages who cannot even able to decide or knew about marriage, Are that kinda marriages allowed in ISLAM? And if we assume, if a girl marries at a very young age and then become attractive towards young man then what her older husband do? If a girl didn't find her older husband attractive?
The Answer:
According to the religion of Islam, a person who is sane and who has reached puberty can get marry. There may be cultural rules and obligations for marriage but according to Islam, a person does not have to have a degree in order to marry.
The age for marriage changes from person, society, and conditions to person, society and conditions. Marrying as soon as possible after reaching puberty is recommended both by the religion and medicine.(Sibai, al-Mar'a 59 et al.)
The age for marriage changes from person, society, and conditions to person, society and conditions.
The age difference that can cause problems in the life of marriage should be paid attention in terms of being equal or similar. Since dwelling in tranquility (ar-Room 30/21), maintaining the generation of man (al-Hindî XVI/276 “Marry and increase in numbers, as I will take pride in you before other nations on the Day of Judgment” and protecting oneself from harams (for the hadith, see Tirmidhi nikah 1: Nasai, siyam 43; Bukhari, sawm 1, nikah, 2,3); are described as the benefits of marriage in Islam, the age that one of those mentioned above is needed is the recommended age of marriage.
The fact that Allah causes some physiological, psychological changes in man should be the signs of that age. Considering that the three benefits or reasons mentioned above can be affected by the character of the community that one lives in and by the conditions of the environment, everybody should determine that age himself/herself. Marrying as soon as possible after reaching puberty is recommended both by the religion and medicine. ( Sibai, al-Mar'a 59 et al.)
As it is known, the age of puberty and growth for girls in hot countries is earlier than those in cold countries. Even today, girls in Africa complete their growth and marry at an age that can be regarded as too early for us. It is related to the state of growth rather than the number expressing the age.
It should be noted that the ages mentioned for marriage in fiqh books were determined in accordance with the characteristics of the places where the writers of those books lived.
There are extremely amazing issues that vary from culture to culture and community to community. The viewpoint on family and man are among those variables. During the Age of Bliss, so many young people that can be regarded as children by us fought in battles through the permission of the Prophet and were wounded or martyred. We also saw similar examples in the War of Independence. We watched something on TV a few days ago. One school was left without any students because all of the students of that school took part in the War of Independence (It is something that the modern point of view will label as “child abuse” and display. Now, they are trying to give that school the title “Ghazi” (warrior)!
Therefore, when we talk about the Arab community of 1400 years ago, we should not forget that we are members of “modernized” (that is, members that have been degenerated and started to think like Westerners) community. The world does not consist of only the geography and history that we live in.
Our religion does not order us to marry our daughters when they are nine years old. On the contrary, it is recommended that a girl be married when she feels ready for marriage; once our Prophet intervened and prevented a father who wanted to marry her daughter by force.
That is, it is theoretically possible to marry at the age of nine but it should not be understood as an order.
ANSWER 2
If a woman or man is forced to marry due to the threat of death, severe beating, or long-term imprisonment, the marriage becomes invalid. The Messenger of Allah stated the following regarding the issue:
“Allah Almighty forgave my ummah for my sake for the deeds that they did by mistake, forgetfulness and by being forced.” (Ibni Majah, Talaq: 16)
The following hadith reported by Imam Nasai sheds light on the issue:
Khansa bint Khidam of Ansar went to the presence of Hz. Aisha and made the following complaint:
“My father married me off to his brother's son in order to increase his prestige. I do not want to marry him.”
Hz. Aisha said, “Wait until the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) comes." When the Messenger of Allah arrived, Hz. Aisha informed him about the situation. The Messenger of Allah summoned her father and took the authority to marry from him and gave it to her.
Thereupon, Khansa said to the Messenger of Allah (pbuh), “O Messenger of Allah! I accept this marriage but I wanted to show that fathers did not have the authority to marry their daughters off by force.” (Nasai, Nikah: 36)
We understand from the removal of the authority from fathers that they have no right to marry their daughters off by force. Both hadiths above show that the consent of the woman is one of the conditions of a sound marriage. Force eliminates consent; therefore, the marriage becomes invalid.
This decree is the view of the majority of the scholars. However, Hanafi School has a different view. According to them, consent is not one of the conditions of a sound marriage essentially. They show the hadith stating that being serious or joking are regarded as the same in marriage contract as evidence.
However, the view of the majority of the scholars is more appropriate in that it will ensure the safety of the marriage and prevent unjust treatment.
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