Is it religiously allowed to marry without the permission of Parents?

A Brief Description of the Question: 

Is it religiously allowed to marry without the permission of Parents?

The Answer: 

According to the Islamic laws, there are some conditions for the validity of the marriage. One of the conditions is that the couple should have the consent of the woman’s parent. This rule is accepted by three sects except Hanefi. The permission of the parents for the marriage is a “rukn” and condition (şart) for Hanbeli. According to all three sects, the marriage done without the permission of woman’s parents is invalid.

According to the sect Hanefi, the girls who didn’t reach adolescence, who are very immature that they can’t live on their own and those who are senile can’t marry without permission. People apart from those can marry without permissions of their parents, because, the word of the woman is binding in the marriage.

This is a rule of fiqh but, it is an Islamic tradition and family customs, it is the best decision to have the permission of the parents. Normally, people take permission of parents in marriage; they are first consulted and talked apart from some exceptions. When they have the opinion and the consent of the girl, they begin preparations for the marriage.

According to the three sects except Hanefi, the parents, which are rukn of the marriage, are in a position of “compelling parents”. In order; father, grandfather, mom-dad, brother become “compelling parents”. Actually these people can make a virgin girl marry without the permission of her.

This rule may seem absolute, but it has some exceptions and conditions. For example, when these five conditions occur, a woman can marry without permission on her own decisions. These conditions are:

1-When there is any kind of enmity between the woman and the parents of the men.
2-When there is any kind of enmity between the woman and the men' s ancestors
3-When the man is so poor that he can’t give “mihr” (livelihood)
4- When the man is so poor that he can’t give “mehri misil” (similar to mihr)
5-When the man is blind or very old.

In such situations, even if the parents use their authority, the marriage can’t be valid. Because it is clear that the woman will be in a difficult position, that she will have unrest and bad times. The main aim of the marriage is living in happiness and the family’s being the house of bliss.

According to the sect of Shafii, when a man wishes to marry a woman and the girl accepts but the parent objects to it and tries to hinder the marriage, they will be responsible and loses their position of parenthood. And again a proper man wishes to marry a woman but the father demands a very high “başlık” (money paid by the bridegroom to the bride’s family) as it happens in eastern parts of our country, he cant be compelling parent, his parenthood is ignored. The permission of him is not necessary anymore. If possible, people help them marry. If the parent tries to hinder it he gets into a great responsibility.  These bad events happen in places where “başlık” is common and parents bring about some sins and unrest by using their position of parenthood.

It depends on the sect that the permission of parents is included in the conditions of the marriage. But it is important in the respect of traditions and family’s own conditions. Sometimes a woman marries a man and can’t see some facts and can’t think clearly because she is inexperienced, she insists on marrying an improper man. But some time later, she realizes that her husband is improper for her and a continuous unrest begins to occur.

In such situations, the permission of the parents is an Islamic necessity and is suitable for respect to elders. But sometimes, as we mentioned above, the man and the woman who want to marry may be in harmony in respect of interest, idea and character. And the father objects to the marriage by having some prejudices about the man, in this situation it will be better to ignore him. According to the sect Hanefi the marriage is valid, so no need to have permission of him.

1. Hukuk-i islâmiye ve Istılâhat-ı Fıkhiyye Kamusu, 2: 55-8.
2. el-Ümm, 5: 20; Şafiî ilmihali, s. 443.

Read More

Marriage issue

A Brief Description of the Question: 

I am a Sunni girl, my age is 22. I want to marry a guy whom I love. He proposed me. And I really like him a lot. I talked to my mother about my love. And that he proposed me, and he wants to send his parents for the proposal. But she said that I am too young and this is not the right age to get married for me. Also, she said that I have elder sister and brothers so I should not a thing of marriage before them. I agreed on her and decided to wait. And I told my love to wait for the right time. Now the problem is my love's father who is not living with him right now engaged him with someone else and in their family. I know my mother just asked me to wait and she will never accept this proposal ever because he is not from my family and my brothers will also create problems. Both families are not agreed. We are mature and want to get married as soon as possible. Please advise us if we can get married without the consent of both families and start a new life because we don’t want to commit any sin... As my mother said this is not the right age of getting married. What does Islam say about that? Please help, we want to get married as soon as possible. Is there anyway?

The Answer: 

Your age is mature enough for marrying. In Islam, one does not have to marry a member of one’s relative. Islam only forbids a woman to marry a non-Muslim man and forbids a man to marry an idolater woman. In the situation, you ask about, according to the sects of Shafii, Hanbali and Maliki you can not marry without permission of your family. However, according to the Hanafi sect, you can marry without permission of them. It is better and advisable for both of you to get your family’s consent. But, if you still insist on marrying and if you are not a Hanafi, you can change your sect into Hanafi. Then, there shall not be any drawback in terms of religion.

For further information, please click on the link given below.

Is a marriage without the consent of the parents valid?

Read More

inheritance

A Brief Description of the Question: 

Assalamu alaikum, My father expired leaving behind his wife, 2 sons and 2 daughters. He had a flat which is worth Rs 1200000 today. We wish to sell it and divide it Islamically. Please help us divide this amount.  jazakallah-u-khair

The Answer: 

According to Islamic Jurisprudence, 1/8 of the inheritance belongs to the wife. The rest is shared out among the sons and daughters, but sons are given two times more than daughters.

As for your question, divide the amount into 48 pieces;

6/48 of it is given to the wife.  

14/48 of it is given to each son.

7/48 of it is given to each daughter.

Mathematically 1200000/48 = 25000  

6*25000 = 150000 (this is the share of the wife)

7*25000 = 175000 (this is the share of each daughter)  

14*25000 = 350000 (this is the share of each son)

Read More

Nikah

A Brief Description of the Question: 

Assalamwalikum, I want to marry. We n our families agreed for our marriage but they want it to be next year i am talking to her daily n i cant live without her. so we decided to go for nikah but not going to tell our parents and we don't want to do anything wrong it's for secuirty so that our parents will not force us to marry someone else. Is this possible to do nikah twice with same girl. pls advise I mentioned email also. ALLAH hafiz

The Answer: 

Doing nikah twice with same girl is not problem, it can be done, but according to the Shafii sect it is not religiously allowed for a woman to marry without the permission of the parents. But according to Hanefi, a woman who is in her adolescence can marry without the permission of her parents. It is not compulsory for a woman in Hanefi sect to get permission for marrying, but it is better to have it. At least, she is supposed to try to have their consent. Their marriage is valid without the permission. She doesn’t become a sinner because of that.

A man doesn’t have to have the permission from his parents for marriage. But the consent of the family is an important issue. It is better when he gains their consent. But when he marries without permission, he doesn’t become a sinner.

Is it religiously allowed to marry without the permission of Parents?
According to the Islamic laws, there are some conditions for the validity of the marriage. One of the conditions is that the couple should have the consent of the woman’s parent. This rule is accepted by three sects except Hanefi. The permission of the parents for the marriage is a “rukn” and condition for Hanbeli. According to all three sects, the marriage done without the permission of woman’s parents is invalid.

According to the sect Hanefi, the girls who didn’t reach adolescence, who are very immature that they can’t live on their own and those who are senile can’t marry without permission. People apart from those can marry without permissions of their parents, because, the word of the woman is binding in the marriage.

This is a rule of fiqh but, it is an Islamic tradition and family customs, it is the best decision to have the permission of the parents. Normally, people take permission of parents in marriage; they are first consulted and talked apart from some exceptions. When they have the opinion and the consent of the girl, they begin preparations for the marriage.

According to the three sects out of Hanefi, the parents, which are rukn of the marriage, are in a position of “compelling parents”. In order; father, grandfather, mom-dad, brother become “compelling parents”. Actually these people can make a virgin girl marry without the permission of her.

This rule may seem absolute, but it has some exceptions and conditions. For example, when these five conditions occur, a woman can marry without permission on her own decisions. These conditions are:
1-When there is any kind of enmity between the woman and the parents of the men.
2-When there is any kind of enmity between the woman and the men.
3-When the man is so poor that he can’t give “mihr” (livelihood)
4- When the man is so poor that he can’t give “mehri misil” (similar to mihr)
5-When the man is blind or very old.

In such situations, even if the parents use their authority, the marriage can’t be valid. Because it is clear that the woman will be in a difficult position, that she will have unrest and bad times. The main aim of the marriage is living in happiness and the family’s being the house of bliss.
According to the sect of Shafii, when a man wishes to marry a woman and the girl accepts but the parent objects to it and tries to hinder the marriage, they will be responsible and loses their position of parenthood. And again a proper man wishes to marry a woman but the father demands a very high “başlık” (money paid by the bridegroom to the bride’s family) as it happens in eastern parts of our country, he cant be compelling parent, his parenthood is ignored. The permission of him is not necessary anymore. If possible, people help them marry. If the parent tries to hinder it he gets into a great responsibility.  These bad events happen in places where “başlık” is common and parents bring about some sins and unrest by using their position of parenthood.

It depends on the sect that the permission of parents is included in the conditions of the marriage. But it is important in the respect of traditions and family’s own conditions. Sometimes a woman marries a man and can’t see some facts and can’t think clearly because she is inexperienced, she insists on marrying an improper man. But some time later, she realizes that her husband is improper for her and a continuous unrest begins to occur.

In such situations, the permission of the parents is an Islamic necessity and is suitable for respect to elders. But sometimes, as we mentioned above, the man and the woman who want to marry may be in harmony in respect of interest, idea and character. And the father objects to the marriage by having some prejudices about the man, in this situation it will be better to ignore him. According to the sect Hanefi the marriage is valid, so no need to have permission of him.
1. Hukuk-i islâmiye ve Istılâhat-ı Fıkhiyye Kamusu, 2: 55-8.
2. el-Ümm, 5: 20; Şafiî ilmihali, s. 443.

Read More

My Islamic problem

A Brief Description of the Question: 

I love one person. His name is Shanavaz. He was a step to come in Islam. I have converted myself to Islam from the heart. Now that gay's brother is saying leave my brother. And I don't want to and he also. Only my and his family is not accepting.

The Answer: 

click on the links given below for the answer.

Can a Muslim woman marry a non-Muslim man?

Is it religiously allowed to marry without the permission of Parents?

Read More

when is salat istikhara offered?

A Brief Description of the Question: 

when is salat istikhara offered?

The Answer: 

There is no private time for the salat of İstikhara. As it can be performed during the night, also it can be performed during the day. But it is mostly performed before going to bed.

Read More

marriage

A Brief Description of the Question: 

salam. i have a problem that is hard to explain, i will try my best. i am 21 years old and my little cousin is 16, he had his mangnee with my other cousin, who is 14 right now. Both parties agreed when the 2 were babies and they don't know about it yet. i went to visit her and her family, and we have a good friendship. i was wondering if it's ok to ask my parents if they can talk to her side of the family to arrange my marriage with her, without making anyone upset. thankyou and again mysalam

The Answer: 

Majority of the Islamic scholars think that an engagement or a nikah without the consent of the engaged part is not valid, but some says if the nikah is solemnized with the consent of the parents it is valid.

We think that to solemnize a marriage without the consent of the engaged parts is not true especially if the parts are just baby while this marriage was solemnized.

Read More